河水从来就不会逆流，
我对你的感情也不会回头

exam.. exam...exam...

counting down.....

tomorrow is the third paper.. after this week.. 4 more to go...
what is my feelings??
a lot.. mixed... as i read my friend's blog.. tired..
indeed... until a certain point...
i ask myself... what is the motivation to continue to study..
i find it so hard to study for this exam...
a lot of things occurring in my mind...
maybe one of the thing which i enjoy the most except watching movie in hostel..
is listening to the typing sound when im writing this blog...
long time i din type something dy.... esp writing blog...

i feel this is the toughest exam i ever take because im facing my own Giant...
what is wrong with me?? that i cant study...
but in the same time, it did brought me closer and closer to God..
because it is Him that im depending on...
because i can only rely on Him now...
He is the only one i can turn to ....
thank God for my fellow friends for your msg and calls...
that really makes a lot of difference....
*dad gonna kill me for my phone bill... but talking through phone is the fastest way for me to pick up my emotion and study again...*

is time to get back into books and continue to fight fight fight....
which i know that i have the end of the victory in Christ Jesus...

listening to praise and worship songs... reading David Livingstone story in exploring to the Afrika and how he has go through for the sake of gospel and depending on God....
From what he has done, the people in Afrika sees a Christian as ...
~Christian is someone who live according to God's promises and be someone of trustworthy despite all the challenges and suffering.~
Am i qualified to be in this definition?? i hope...my aim..

~ Proverbs 3:5 = Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.
~ Proverbs 3:6 = Remember the Lord in all you do and he will give you success.

study week的我-宅女

今天, 是我第四天孤独的在宿舍的房里
我竟然..... 做了四天的宅女...
我在这里的生活是读书, 看戏, 睡觉...
没多没少....
除了厕所和晚餐, 我都没有踏步出去房间..

这几天,
除了讲电话和吃晚餐的交谈,
我没有与除了我自己以外的人讲话

天啊.......我快要受不了了...
一向很多话讲的人...
一向很好动的人...
我却.... 待在房间里....
最多的运动, 哪怕就是走下去买晚餐...
最多的话, 哪怕就是在电话里的谈话...

有点开始要疯了的感觉...
没错, 在这里确实可以监督和逼自己读书
但是, 也可以很沮丧.. 很低落...面对这四面墙...只有电脑的陪伴
为了这个大考.....

在第一年时, 我并没有这样的感觉
因为... 有alice陪我一起读书, 一起熬夜...一起看戏.. 哈哈...
人啊...确实不能一个人活着....

感恩.... 晚餐时, 看到人和有人陪我谈天
感恩....至少可以讲电话.. 好朋友实在对我太好了....
感恩....还有上帝陪我....
感恩....今天遇到了雪倪... 很贴心的给了我一碗的糖水 (真的很感动.. )
感恩....明天, 我就要回家了....

虽然.. 还有很多没读完...
但是... 能回家的感觉真的很好...
感谢明天要载我回家的那个天使... 哈哈

~看了一套戏...
那位男子对那女子很好, 超好多的..
就是愿意的让她开心.. 就是很维护, 照顾她..爱她...
她一句.. 我累了, 他就毫不犹豫的背起她...
她一有危险... 他就会第一个站在她的前面,保护她...
我知道...这只是偶像剧...但是...
忽然间, 内心真的很期望身边有一个他会那么的为我...~

放弃吧...

你知道吗??

或许是我天真...
或许是很傻...
或许是我的一厢情愿
但是.. 我真的很想去相信..
可是, 我的心已经不能再负荷.. 那破碎的感觉

我看似一个很现实的人
我看似一位很犀利的人
或许, 很多时候..
我都会说...这就是现实社会
我好像已经适应了这个社会
但是... 其实...
我不能.. 不想...
在我内心的某一处...
依然渴望童话... 依然..秉持着那份坚持去相信

我一直以来都相信..
无论, 什么事情.. 有多么的傻...
有多么的阻碍...
我都相信..

但是.. 这一刻...
我开始分不清了..
我讨厌灰色地带..
我... 害怕去相信了..
我失去了.. 那份坚持
那份相信的勇敢...

或许... 是时候.. 别再单纯
是时候... 转换心情, 态度去看这个事情
是时候... 放弃吧...
虽然...我很难做得到...
但是, 是时候去放了...
这样.. 至少对我.. 是一种解脱...

考试要到了....

最近的我..

总是提不起劲, 写部落..
有很多事情的发生...
本人..也觉得, 每天都很幸福..
但是, 就是缺了写作的冲动..
或许.. 这就是我...
要写时, 就会写很多..
不想写时, 就会荒废了这个部落..
正所谓: 灵感很重要..心情更重要:p

这个星期, 就是这个学期的最后一个星期了
过了study week, 我们就必须应付考试..
这次的考试, 一点把握都没有..
更因为这样, 必须完完全全的依赖上帝
我, 只能尽我的全力, 把成绩交给上帝了...

呵呵...心里其实, 已经超越了考试,
很想尽快享受那5个星期的假期....

为每个要考试的朋友们, 加油吧!!!　

终于忙完了!!!!

最近..

终于..忙完了所有的功课..
这个学期, 真的很恐怖..
第一个星期, 就已经有assignment了..
每个星期, 都在赶着不一样的assignment...
都没有停下来的..
每个assignment都要找好几本书, 了解再写很多面...
花了13个星期, 15个assignment终于做完了!!!!!!!
内心实在是爽!!开心的!!!

所以, 我给了自己一个星期的假期..
就是无所事事...做些自己喜欢的东西..
打羽毛球.. 跑步... 看连续剧.. 与朋友出街..
哈哈...

最近, 很时常被感动了...
那天...
我的一个简讯.. 心情低潮..
你就打电话来了...
你知道吗?? 我真的很开心, 很感动...
听到你的声音, 我就自然的笑了..

那天...
陪我去逛街... 我觉得很幸福...

我带了朋友去了我从小就去的眼镜店
帮她配了一副, 又合她心意, 价钱又合算的眼镜..
我真的很替她高兴.. 也很感恩, 那老板, 永远都那么好..
都很疼我的... 哈哈.. 不枉我这12年都是在那里处理眼镜问题

那天...
参加了朋友21岁生日...哈哈..
今年, 朋友们都是21 岁.. 都有大势庆祝一番
其实, 我到了那里, 跟寿星女很少交流,
反而是一班的朋友, 在那里交谈..
哈哈.. 那一晚, 真的很有趣..
笑了又笑... 笑到眼泪都不自觉地流下来
生日会, 确实是一很好gathering 的地方..
哈哈...

还有.. 当有人就是那么的疼你的感觉..
真的很幸福.. 很开心的..
不用我拿食物, 就有食物了..
还有人帮我切肉..就这样可以,放进口里就可以了..
就是有人可以帮你做很多事情.. 虽然你没有开口...
哈哈.. 感动.. 幸福...

明天, 要背60 个经文.. 加油咯!!!!!

我在国大, 心理学系的大家庭

我一直很感恩上天让我遇到了我现在的系友 在大学的日子, 有时很大压力, 很孤独... 幸好有他们... 陪我一一度过.. 我们从原本的不认识, 到不是很熟悉 到今天的一个大家庭.. 很感谢每个人都尽一份力去把这份关系搞好 这个大家庭.. 总共有18个成员.. 大姐 -Grace 二姐 - 淑璇 三姐 - 沁怡 四姐 - 雪倪 五姐 - 琬淋 六姐 - 美雯(你的雯好像没有在字典里) 七姐 - 李舫 八姐 - 李韵 九姐 - 颖怡 十姐 - 美君 十一 - 是我 :) 韵璇 十二妹 - 翠婷 十三妹 - 祖儿 十四弟 - 兴杰 十五妹 - Sharon 十六妹 - 美怡 十七妹 - 秀淇(你的秀好像没有在字典里) 十八妹 - 恩万

 这个家庭里, 有点阴阳失调.. 哈哈..只有一位男的.. 我们还有双胞胎呢 :) 虽然, 我们的个性不相同.. 但是, 能够和睦相处, 相亲相爱...互相扶持... 我最喜欢就是当大家一起吃午餐时.. 真的很有家的感觉.. 或许, 我们真的要再搞更多的pt.... 增进感情嘛~~ 在这里, 有他们...我觉得很幸福 :) *在大学,还有很多.. 虽然不是系友, 但是就是因为上帝的安排, 让我们认识了他们... 他们也是陪伴, 帮助了我很多.. 例如: roommates, floormates, blockmates, prayer mates, CLC.. etc.. 在此, 也要谢谢他们...

updates of my life

is been a while i din really update my blog as frequently before.. prob.. there is a time of writing.. and a time of stop writing.. haha.. let me update what is happening in my life starting from........ er...... in holiday maybe??? haha.. basically.. in holiday.. Tuesday.. meet up with ps Noah and Florence.. finally can spend a little time with them.. Wednesday i cut my hair with wai han.. look a bit kiddy... hehe.. looks younger and childish:P

er.. this is before cutting hair the photo.. should have take another photo of after:P

then ar.. i watch G force in TS Digi IMAX there.. very big screen.. in the same time, i have gathering with my old secondary frens also.. oops.. din manage to take photo.. but for once.. i can fetch them home.. and ya.. that night.. me, see and yen.. went out.. (place:secret) Thursday i have form 6 gathering with 10 of them.. others not free to make it:) but do have some wonderful time with them.. catching up.. is hard to gather after form six...but at least all of us still make an effort to keep this frenship together:)

these are my fellow frens in form 6...
i really enjoy the time where we have more guy classmates than girls:P

Saturday i went to fun fair with wan see, huey yen... hehe.. all the funds in this fun fair will be used for church building fund of In Touch TBC... here.. i would like to thank everyone who has bought coupon from me.. thank you for supporting.. and i know some just buy it because of me.. though didn't go.. for this, i would really want to say a big thank you... not to forget to thank Ps Noah.. for giving me coupons to spend on that day.. hehe...

me and see :)

three of us... happily buying almost all the things in fun fair :P

my youngest sis, manda.. happily buying the balloon...

nite... going another function near my house.. just to go there to makan:P

Sunday... i have to become emcee for an event.. quite big function de.. around 800+ ppl... my mom.. always create opportunity for me to train my skills.. anyway.. this is one of the functions that i really enjoy becoming emcee with my partner.. and it ended punctually.. hehe.. 1030pm... Monday.. viva.. stress.. thank God is over.. and i have did my best.. Tuesday.. i know my mid sem result.. Thank God for the result.. had a great lunch with coursemates.. though is just normal lunch, but the fact of all of us sit together and eat.. is fun night time, qin yi, me and wan lin drive coursemates to give mui jean a surprise haha.. indeed surprise her and more surprisely.. to find out.. patrick was actually a present:P finally we have another photo of us together.. just left sharon.. because of gastrick.. together celebrate 21 birthday with frens.. the feelings somehow very diff..

these are my coursemates and 2 juniors.. and patrick who is not in the photo :)

Wednesday... did nothing in particulary... Thursday.. class as usual.. the psikodrama is good:) and discussed with group mates on how to do for our psikodrama.. then at 12am, went to esther room to do SPSS.. simply because dunno why i cant open my SPSS sorftware.. haha.. finally finish computing SPSS data.. Friday.. waited for U2 class.. but... later did i know.. the class is cancelled.. is ok.. 12pm together with agnes, theng and my sis drive back kl.. though a bit late in the sense.. still manage to go sing k with agnes and wan see.. haha.. 3 of us but in a big big room with 4 mic.. yeah.. everyone got one mic to sing.. very enjoy that day.. like singing:P though my voice not that nice.. haha.. agnes had to leave at 6pm.. so left me and see sing the remaining time.. haha.. first time in my life.. 2 person sing k... then we go walk walk and eat natural ice cream :P

 Saturday is mooncake festival day:) helping grandma to do some cooking... doing house chores.. then do ass... at night.. eat reunion dinner with my grandparents, uncles and aunties,cousins.. then depart to Eunice's mansion... haha.. had a great time there.. long time din play lantern dy lo.. so is a time of recalling those memories....

some of the lantern.. cute le.. somemore got hello kitty???

the food and lots of mooncake..

new frens that i know during the mooncake celebration :)

Sunday went to church.. spend time with God... then at home doing nothing the whole day.. haha.. this i really enjoy...